All that stands in between the finale and Andi’s happily ever after is The Men Tell All episode.

Who got kicked off: Gone is Farmer Chris, and the hearts of women across America sighed in disappointment. Though, I don’t know why. That frees him up for all you ladies!

Nick

They wore matching bathing suits and played in the sand on their own private beach. Then. Then. Are you paying attention? Then, Nick busted out a storybook. It brought me back to all of the poetry from previous seasons. It was a book he had made, detailing his and Andi’s love story. Are there pictures? I asked hopefully. Ask and you shall receive. Complete with colored pencil drawings, Nick proceeded to read through the book. Afterwards he pulled Andi aside, away from the cameras, and listed off all of the things he loved about her, all of the things he couldn’t say directly with the storybook. This fantastic storybook. Then he told her he loved her. I may have to fight off @the_hunt_club for rights to this book.

Josh

Josh and Andi had another hanging-out-with-the-locals date around the Domincan Republic, where Josh could show off his Spanish-speaking skills and make Andi’s heart go pitter-patter. They danced merengue in the street, terribly mind you, but with tons of enthusiasm. Then they played baseball with a bunch of kiddos. At one point they were sitting on a park bench making out and Josh told her he loved her. They had their own personal fireworks display and went back to the Fantasy Suite.

Chris

Chris and Andi went horseback riding in a wide, expansive field and then played another round of Ghosts in the Graveyard. I always called it Sardines, but apparently there is another name for it. In any case, dinner rolled around and the tears came out. Andi started sobbing because she told Chris she was going to send him home, right then and there. No rose ceremony. No trip to the Fantasy Suite. In the words of Andrea Lavinthal, Director of PEOPLE Style & Beauty, “It’s not you. It’s Iowa.” While Andi told Chris she can’t just blame it on Iowa, I’m pretty sure that was a big determining factor. There is a ton of speculation that Chris will be the next Bachelor. People on Twitter seem to adore him. I know I’m going to get pushback from this, but I don’t understand the pull to Chris. Can someone tell me what I’m missing?

Rose Ceremony

Only two men left. Andi wanted to have the rose ceremony despite the fact that there were only two men left because she wanted to make sure they knew it was a two-way street and to give them the opportunity to say no. Seems a little late for that, but sure.

Andi: “This is a two-way street.” So tell me now to make my decision easier. I added the part in italics. But you get the gist.

Extras

Parody Twitter Accounts: Discovered this gem: A Josh’s Scarf Twitter handle, called @ScarfofJosh. If you’ll remember we had Ben Flajnik’s hair (@BenFlajniksHair), Sean Lowe’s abs (@SeanLowesAbs), and Tierra’s eyebrow (@TierrasEyebrow) from seasons past.

Andi’s Fashion: I want Andi’s entire wardrobe from this season. Seriously though, that black and white maxi dress she wore when she sent Chris home is everything. Blogger Possessionista has you covered with Andi’s Overnight Fashion. Take a peek at her blog for all of the fashion from this season.

Next week is The Men Tell All before The Bachelor Finale!