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Roll Tide Count: 0. A tailgate instead of a cocktail party because that’s what Mama needs. Hannah Calls the Shots. John Paul Jones Remains John Paul Jones. Tyler C. is MVP. Red Alabama Crimson Flags are Flying. Bless Luke P.’s Heart.
That’s Southern talk for best be watching out, Luke P. Hannah B. is calling the shots. Tyler C. is MVP of this round with his strong woman compliments. John Paul Jones has the best reactions and will solve disputes with chicken nuggets. Hannah B. had a sit-down with Luke P. and Cam.
Who got kicked off: Always Be Cam, Joey, Jonathan and Tyler G. went home this week.
What happened to Tyler G., receiver of the first One-on-One date?
Tyler Gwozdz mysteriously disappeared midway through the episode. I thought I had missed something, but no, it was just one sentence by Hannah B. that we were given, notifying us of his departure. Hannah B. said Tyler G. just had to leave. That was it. No explanation was given, but Reality Steve said there were rumors about his previous relationships that you can find if you search for it. Apparently, the allegations were enough to warrant the producers and lawyers of the show to promptly remove him from the running. Refinery 29 and US Weekly cite Reality Steve and a Reddit thread saying Tyler G. spit on an ex-girlfriend and was a misogynist. ABC has yet to comment.
“While the guys were out on this date, production came to the mansion and removed Tyler G. from the show. They had been given some information about his past relationships and told him it wouldn’t be good for him to remain on the show and he needed to leave immediately.” – Reality Steve
Who Got the Date Roses: Peter the Pilot got a rose on a group date. Nice Eyebrows Mike got a rose on a group date and Connor got a rose on a one-on-one date after he made Hannah B. a cute post-it note scavenger hunt after taking care of her from her sick day.
Group Date #1 had the guys experiencing what it was like for a woman during pregnancy. Hannah B. had them learning about the female anatomy, walking around in pregnancy getups and the wonder of lower back pain and the motherload of all motherloads a simulated labor pains. John Paul Jones had the best facial reaction and Tyler C. (aka Magic Mike, but I now realize that is confusing with other Mike (Nice Eyebrows Mike), so I will try to call him Tyler, even though construction-dancer man is a real life Magic Mike) had the best reaction-reaction: “I wanted to call my Mom. Women do run the world.” That’s right. Get in Formation.
Tyler C. also complimented Hannah B. saying she was a “badass woman and that’s the biggest turn on about [her] and [he] wants to be the one fueling that fire.” YAS, Queen. Yes. MVP.
Chicken Nuggets made a surprising comeback this season. First John Paul Jones used the chicken nuggets to break up a tense moment between Jonathan and Cam. And now Jed is using them as a gesture to make a wish by chucking them off of a building. Odd.
Jed is still stealing Hannah B.’s heart and as we saw in the previews, they’re headed to Boston for a date! Jed told us that he’s really liking this girl and had her make a wish that she could only tell him on their first one-on-one date after she threw a chicken nugget off of the roof of a building.
John Paul Jones struggggled through labor pains, and I don’t think he ever wants to experience that again. His facial expressions are what keep us going.
One-on-One Date: Connor got a one-on-one date after Hannah got put in the hospital. Hannah had visited the hospital earlier that day after having fainted in her hotel room. They pumped her with fluids and she was told to rest. Instead of going sailing, Connor and Hannah rested in her hotel room. He wrote her a cute scavenger hunt using post-it notes telling of all the things he loves about her. Hannah B. found them when she woke up and loved it. Later that night, she sent a driver to pick him up so she could surprise him with a rose and a private concert with Lucas Graham singing Love Someone.
This guy got all the screentime.
Group Date #2 was a photo shoot with all kinds of model animals – a mini pony, a hairless dog, a piglet and a snake. Demi came back to set up hidden cameras and spot any man that flirted with someone other than Hannah B. All men passed much to Demi’s disappointment. (Fun Fact: Demi will be on Bachelor in Paradise so you can get more of your Demi fill then.)
Luke P. Let’s talk about Luke P. and Hannah’s taste in men. I’m hoping she’ll grow out of this, but Hannah B. is picking all of the bad dudes – aka Tyler G. and Luke P. Luke P. tried to walk Hannah B. to her dressing room. He interrupted one of her photo shoots with one of the other guys and had STEAM coming out of his head when Hannah B. said she wanted to talk to everyone on the group date.
Hannah B. pulled him away first at the cocktail part of the group date and told him she did not think he was respecting her other relationships and that bothered her. She also told him that she wants to call her own shots. Boom. And then she pulled every guy on the group date aside to talk to them and get to know them.
And Luke P. was like nooope, I’m gonna pretend like that conversation never happened. Red Flags. Big Bright Alabama Crimson Red Flags are flying high, Hannah B. Luke P. tried to get more time because he said she mostly just talked at him and he didn’t get to say anything. He got visibly steamed and heated and at Peter the Pilot no less, when Peter was just trying to talk to her because he hadn’t at all that night. Oh, Luke P. you are going down.
Before Hannah B. handed out the rose she pulled Luke P. aside and said, “I really like you, but this has to change.”
That’s when Peter the Pilot swooped. See what I did there. Peter the Pilot told her that his mom was a pageant queen too. Miss Illinois. He also shared that his mom and dad met on a flight, his dad a pilot and his mom a stewardess. His mom saw his dad’s booty and said that’s the man I’m going to marry. What a meet-cute. Peter the Pilot took Hannah B. out to the courtyard and they had a hot make-out session in her cute, tiny, sparkly, black romper.
“Every time I leave her feeling so happy.” – That a Kid, Peter the Pilot.
Cocktail Party Turned Tailgate. Roll Tide!
Hannah B. decided to have a tailgate instead of a cocktail party, because that’s what “mama needed,” she said.
Cam Prior to the tailgate, Cam made an announcement that he needed to take time with Hannah B. to tell her a story that might get him sent home. The guys called BS and said no to Cam’s rules of engagement. Cam interrupted Hannah B.’s game of cornhole. So help me, if anyone pulls me away from a cornhole tournament, they are gonna need to say some blessings because that just ain’t ok. Cam took Hannah away to tell a story, still unclear what all that hullabaloo was about, but Hannah B. was tipped off by Nice Eyebrows Mike that it was a calculated move, and Cam had written good-bye letters to the guys earlier that day. Hannah B. said it felt slimey and confronted Cam. Cam admitted to writing good-bye letters. Not great Tailgate manners, Cam.
Tyler C. on the other hand, had excellent tailgate manners. Can we talk about how hot that man is? He kept it light and playful with Hannah Beast, letting her touch his tight tooshy and telling her to bring out the beast and had her play a block pad football drill. Hannah B. most definitely fell down. But it was cute.
He also had a good analogy when Cam mentioned again that he was going to step on toes because his relationship is what mattered. Contractor Tyler C. said, “Can’t we all agree that it’s like youth soccer though, where if we’re all stepping on each others’ toes, they all just follow the ball, not getting anywhere.” Sometimes you gotta play the game, Cam, if you want to score.
Eh, doesn’t matter. Cam went home at the rose ceremony. Hannah B. let the dudes know there were no pity roses.
Next week and the season on The Bachelorette the crew is traveling.
How are those brackets and Roll Tide drinking games going? I have faith in y’all.
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