Luke P. and Jed said Told Hannah B. They Loved Her. Hannah B. Kept All Four Men And Jed was PISSED. All Four Men Are Headed to Fantasy Suite Dates AND SOMEONE Gets Jiggy WITH HANNAH IN THE WINDMILL! TWICE.

Who Got Kicked Off: No one. They all got a rose and all four (Jed, Luke P., Tyler C. and Peter the Pilot) are going to Fantasy Suite Dates in Crete, Greece! Woohoo! Bring on the windmills!

 

Peter the Pilot – Westlake Village, CA

Just down the road from the Bachelor Mansion, Peter the Pilot is up first to take us to new heights.

Peter is adorable. His family is adorable. Their house is adorable. Little brother Jack is adorable. Period. That’s all you need to know. Feel free to skip ahead because the rest is just gushing about how cute Peter the Pilot and his family are.

This date was ripe for pilot love puns. For instance, “It’s such an amazing opportunity just to soar to that next level,” and “I’m looking for my copilot for life.”

Peter the Pilot took her flying. On the drive over to his hanger, rummaging through his car’s glove compartment, Hannah B. found a condom. Peter the Pilot was embarrassed and Hannah teased him about what he thought was going to happen in his car. At the airplane hanger, the pair did a pre-flight check and Peter the Pilot took off above LA. Hannah B. spotted the Bachelor mansion in the air. And Peter, adorable Peter, told her that’s where they first met. He also pointed out his house. His mom and dad were outside looking for him flying and said, “That’s my boy!” ADORABLE. Nailed the landing too. Upon landing, Peter told Hannah, “The happiness you give, me is just I’ve never felt this. And the relationship we have is truly special.” At the house, Mama made Cuban food. They did a German prayer. “Happy is the meal time feast with your loved ones. Happy, happy, happy. Let’s eat!” Peter’s family just wants the world for him. His mom is so sweet. In her talk with Hannah B., she told Hannah she loves her and that Peter is head over heels for Hannah, and that “I just wish that God will find a path for you. And, of course, would I love it to be with our son? Absolutely. I am in need of a daughter.” She just wants the best for Hannah. What a SWEETHEART.

Peter teared up at meal time when he made a toast about how even his Nana and Pop Pop would have loved Hannah.

AND THEN Peter the Pilot’s dad teared up because he ALSO only wants the best for his son. Dear lord. WHERE ARE MY TISSUES?

And they ended with “Blessings! Blessings!” as they walked out the door. Be still my beating heart.

Now casting for Jack’s (Peter’s younger bro) love interest. Because I mean, c’mon look at that face and who doesn’t want to marry into this family?

Tyler C. – Jupiter, FL

 

Tyler and Hannah explored Jupiter by boat and heated up the beaches. Tyler drove the boat. Tyler showed her where his first house was growing up. They played in the water. Hannah and Tyler went jammin’ and recreated Dirty Dancing. Hannah B. is ready for answers if Tyler C. is ready for marriage yet.

Before Tyler left for the show, his dad was recovering from a surgery. Tyler’s dad was in a coma and now has a paralyzed vocal chord. Tyler hadn’t seen him since he left for the show. It was an emotional reunion. Tyler C. went immediately to hug his pops. Tyler’s dad Jeff calls Hannah, Miss Hannah B. and my heart melts. Tyler’s dad said he hoped Tyler didn’t get kicked off night one. Tyler C. signed away his rights when his dad went in to surgery and his brothers said Tyler was a rock for when their dad was in the hospital.

Words by Tyler’s Dad: “You can’t plan to fall in love. You would have all of our love and support any parent can truly give.” Tears!

When Tyler C. walked Hannah B. out to say good-bye, he snuck in one last make-out session.

Tyler C. had The. Best. Good-bye. He gently tapped her in to the limo and followed her inside for a hot make-out session x100.

Luke P. – Gainesville, GA

“Luke is a jigsaw puzzle for me. I have the corners, but I don’t have the middle part figured out.” – Hannah B. about Luke P.

Luke does not have this hometown date figured out. The first part is for spending time together, not throwing her to the wolves immediately upon arrival. Luke P. took Hannah Beast to Sunday School before the church service. It was basically a merry-go-round of people coming up to Hannah B. and telling her how great Luke P. was with Luke P. sharing his shower story again. What a great hometown for Hannah B. That sounds fun and exactly what I want to do as the first thing touching down in a new hometown. Not go on a flight or a boat ride or do Dirty Dancing or anything. Nah, throw me to the wolves straight out the gate and let’s talk about you. And I would just love to hear your testimony one more time. I never tire of it. The worst hometown date ever. I want a redo.

Luke P. tells the same testimony word-for-word. Rehearsed. “I remember getting in the shower. This weight on me. And the Lord saying, ‘Luke, let go. Let go, and follow me. I remember I could see a glimpse into heaven.'” Luke, let go of Hannah B., especially if you’re not going to practice what you preach.

At Luke P.’s house on the couches, Hannah B. told Luke P.’s family that it wasn’t fine the whole time and that there were red flags and that there were bumps along the way to get here, but he’s still here. Even his family was like so why is he still here?

Break for admiring how ridiculously young and beautiful Luke P.’s mom is. Tell me where the fountain of youth lives, Mama Luke P.

“It’s been a ride with your son. I’m glad I’m here, but whoo,” Hannah B. told Luke P.’s dad. Like what? That should not be your 6 week relationship you’re bringing to the table. It was really rough to get here, but look at how we made it. I feel like it should be more fun than that in the beginning?

At the end of the day, Luke P. dropped an L. bomb. He told Hannah B. that without a doubt he could tell her he loved her. She got all kinds of butterflies and it was the worst.

Hannah B. to Luke P.: “We had a good day, all day. That’s a big deal. It was a good reset.” RED FLAG. You mean to tell me you have had ONE day where nothing went wrong? And it’s because all of Luke’s posse said good things about him all day. That sounds like a terrible day. I thought dating was supposed to be fun?

Hannah B. about Luke: “I have fallen in love with him. I am falling in love with him” Hannah B. said in an interview. Blech.

Jed – Knoxville, TN

Jed took her to a music studio to write their own love song. It was average. They talked about Boston’s cobble-stoned streets and their love being written in the stars. I wish they would have included if they were English or American. Jed dropped the L-bomb. He told Hannah he was in love with her. Hannah’s heart soared. Until she met the family…

Jed’s dad AND dog did a run-jump-Hannah-like hug to Jed as Jed and Hannah entered the backyard BBQ.

Jed’s mom was uber passive aggressive. During her time with Hannah, she told Hannah that Hannah says nice things about all the men to their parents and basically that Jed wasn’t special to Hannah. Hannah told her that Jed was the only one she had said she was falling in love with to him, and that seemed to pacify Mama Jed.

Jed’s sister was just aggressive. She outright said she was protective of her brother and that she wanted him to be able to focus on his music and that marriage didn’t sound like that would make it possible.

Jed’s family wants Jed to focus on music and emphasized Jed was on a different path. Jed’s mom almost brought up the previous girlfriend, but bypassed it by saying Jed had lived. Nice.

So basically, Hannah will follow him around wherever his music career will take him and then where does that leave Hannah for her goals? Boy, bye. It’s called The Bachelorette. Not Music Man Jed.

Jed’s mom has also followed Luke P.’s mom to the fountain of youth. Tell me your secrets, Gina!

Rose Ceremony

Hannah Beast harnessing her inner Star Trek.

At the rose ceremony, Hannah B. did not have clarity. She called Peter the Pilot first, followed by Tyler C. for the roses handed out. Woot! Then Hannah Beast had a moment of hesitation and excused herself from the room. Chris Harrison asked if she was OK and Hannah replied with a straightforward, “No.” She told the producers she was “there” (meaning at a good point in their relationships) with all of the men and that she hadn’t had time to fully explore all of the relationships. She needed more time. Hannah B. returned and told the men she couldn’t hand out the final rose.

Chris Harrison walked out with two more roses. All four men are going to Fantasy Suite Dates. Everybody stays. And Jed wants answers. Dude, you cannot be surprised with how your hometown date went that you were left last with Luke P. Your entire family was like, focus on your music.

Tweets of the Night: Shoutout to @scoopmoore for finding these gems. The rest of the tweets are about Peter the Pilot because obviously we need more Peter in our lives.

In the previews, the crew travels to Crete, Greece. And FINALLY we get to see the Luke P. blowout. Give us all of the wine. We’re ready. AND we get to find out who Hannah B. Does it in the WINDMILL with…twice!! Note Hannah B.’s comment below on Nick Viall’s Instagram post. Hannah B. do NOT flirt with Nick Viall! Do not engage. We all know how that ends!